WRONG WAY TO REACT TO FAILURE
Your reaction to failure today, grants you your success tomorrow. That's a sure bet. If you reacted courageously, you will excel to success but if you allow it pull you down, then open your arms and accept the gift of failure. Sweeties, if you really want success, do not react to failure or respond to it by:
It seems to be the hardest thing in the world to admit we've made a mistake and try to put it right. Acknowledgment of one's wrong or mistake is one of the hardest but best attitudes one can learn You cannot gain experience without your knowing your mistake, understanding it and leaving it behind when you must have dealt with it correctly and accurately. Don't deny your mistake and leave it unsolved, if you do, you'll definitely and certainly be doomed for failure. Creep out from your comfort zone and face your safe zone.
v CHASING YOUR LOSSES
We're so anxious not to draw a line under a decision we regret, that we end up causing still more damage while trying to erase it. Don't leave diamonds and chase stones, they will fetch you nothing. Don't focus on what you are but focus on what you'll become. Give no room for you loses to pull or weigh you down. Don't give in to depression and frustration but bear in mind that you are on a journey and in that journey are pot holes and forests. You just have to clear the forests and create a path for yourself and for the pot holes, jump them and pass.
v HEDONIC EDITING
When we engage in hedonic editing, we try to convince ourselves that the mistake doesn't matter. Bundling our losses with our gains or finding some way to interpret our failure as success. Never try to run away from your failure and calling it success. Face it “head-on”. Beat your chest and tell yourself you can do it. Joel Osteen said”, You must make a decision that you are going to move on. It won't happen automatically. You will have to rise up and say, I don't care how disappointed I am. I'm not going to let this get the best of me. I'm moving on with my life”. Have this mindset and don't play around failure.
Why Do You Fail
One may start wondering, “why did I not make it, is my own case different? Everybody I know keeps going higher and I am retarded. Even the ones I have tried and made a little seem to be going away and be drifting away with the flood. All my efforts seem to be going down the drain”.
As any great person sincerely admits, failure do come and happen. We have all had our fair share of it but from each failure, we learn two equally valuable and tangible lessons. One, that we failed and the other that we can rebound from that failure. If you are looking down on yourself as a failure, then you know one of these may be the cause:
· You lack persistence
Many, if not most people fail not because they lack knowledge or talent but because they just quit. They give in to their failures and allow it override them. It is of great necessity to always remember these two words: PERSISTENCE AND RESISTENCE. Persist in what must be done and resist what ought not be done. Due to lack of persistence, when you find going getting tough, you duck out too early instead of pushing through.
· You Lack conviction
Even when you apply all the methods you know, you seem not to be convinced that you have done well. You are never satisfied with what you do; you love to be a duplicate. You never want to be an original. All you do is living the life of another and your life lags behind. People who lack conviction take the middle of the road. Whatever happens, you get run over. People run over and step on you. Don't forget that in this race, overtaking is allowed. There is no penalty for overtaking, so do not slide back; be at the top and ride with speed. However, do not ride on the highway to avoid accidental crush. People without conviction go along to get along because they lack confidence and courage. They stagger, they do not have stamina and are easy to be pulled down. They want to conform in other to get accepted even when they know that what they are doing is wrong.
· You take in to rationalization
Winners might analyze but they never rationalize. Losers and failures rationalize; they have a book full of excuses to tell you why they couldn't succeed. They must hang their heads somewhere, somehow to cover up their failures. Life is experiencing. There's fne line between simply going through the motions of life and actually living it. Rationalization is not a good choice, don't cling to it.
· You dismiss past failures
It is certain some people live and learn while some only live never to learn. Failure is a lesson and a teacher if we have the right attitude. Wise and great people learn from their mistakes. They never live it untreated. Experience is the name they give to slip ups. They do not tag it failure.
· You lack discipline
If you really want to make it or succeed you must accept discipline. Anyone who has accomplished anything worthwhile has never done it without disciple. They stay focused and submit to discipline.
· You have Low self esteem and negative personality
You are doomed if you lack self respect and self worth. You will constantly be trying to find yourself rather creating the person you want to be if you lack self confidence. Think of yourself as someone still striving towards a goal and you will be able to maintain patience and perseverance for the long race.
· You lack definition of purpose in life
What do you want? Go for it! What are your desires? Pursue them! What do you need? Make the provision! What do you lack? Fill the space for nature does not allow vacuum. What gives you pleasure, do not let it slip away. You deserve to be happy. Find out what you want out of life and go for it. You are the master of your fate and the architecture of your own misery. Define your purpose in life and do not stand in between decision of what you want. Do not let your failure give you a false definition of life.
· You stick to procrastination
It is a dreadful factor that lures its victims to slum. No matter how much you read about the law of attraction, no matter how much you ponder over a project, it remains undone till you start working on it. Do not fold your hands and let great opportunities slip by you. If you keep putting off something, it will never be done. Do not say 'I don't know where to start'. Any way you choose to start marks the beginning. Get started on what you need to do and stop waiting in vain for the right time or you may not even know when the right time comes. Start now; buckle up and procrastinate no more.
· You fear criticism and rejection.
I don't want to do it…I don't even know if they will like it… what if they hate me for that… I can't move on if they reject me… and even if they don't, what if I don't scale through, that may be my downfall. Fear. Do not have this mind-set. Do not criticize yourself before others do. DO not throw away your personality and reject yourself because of what people may think or say if you pursue your dreams. Do not say they may think of me of being pompous or feeling too big. Ask yourself, is your desire for something stronger than your fear of failing at it. No matter what, they may criticize you, spit on you, reject and despise you because you pursue your dream. You are much better than they are because they have not given a trial. Those who would rather not try than fail will inevitably experience failure.
· You are Indecisive
What do you decide upon, right or wrong? You need that strong mind of a well defined mind of decision to opt out of the crowd. You don't have to be comfortable sitting like a rat sitting in the midst of a herd of cattle. It has been proved that people who succeed reach decisions promptly and change them slowly. Those who fail to make decisions or make them slowly have a better chance of failure in any given situation. Decide what is important to you.
· You lack concentration.
Focus! If your mind is distracted, the amount of concentration on any given thing wears thin and gets limited. Log in on Facebook, post pictures on Instagram, chat on Whatsapp, update profile pictures, ping on BBm, tweet on Tweeter, download porn, make irrelevant calls, repeat the process over and over. (My apologies if I've touched someone's, weakness. Especially, the so called leaders of tomorrow. That's life anyway. Every occurrence must not be in favour of you). You might not know how much you have wasted doing insignificant things. Time files, Tempus fugit. Be alert, by keeping your mind alive. Pursue that which adds value to your life. Let concentration be your chief aim. Do not move it to elsewhere unless there is nee.
· You Lack Enthusiasm
If the zeal to move forward is not there, then how can you move on. If you are not enthusiastic about anything you are trying to accomplish, you can't expect others around you to be convinced of your success let alone yourself. Develop that keenness and deep passion for your effort-. Never let your stamina be shaken because you lack the enthusiasm and eagerness to stand upright and focus on the right path. Let your passion show even in mundane tasks. It’s Ok to collaborate and cooperate for success, but it's not Ok to compromise your values – ever.